TO ALL BATTERED MUMS AND MILLENNIAL GENERATION CHILDREN:

IF YOU BELIEVE YOUR RAGE AGAINST ABUSERS WILL SOMEHOW CAUSE GOD/THE GODDESS TO NEED YOU TO STRAP YOURSELF INTO THE HANNIBAL LECTOR RESTRAINTS, THEN THAT IS SUICIDAL IDEATION. VISUALIZE THAT THE ABUSERS WILL NEED TO BE FORCED INTO THAT. THEN, GATHER ALL RED, SPIKED HIGH HEELS UP AT THRIFT STORES TO TURN INTO A FEMINIST DART-THROWING COMPETITION. ACT JUST LIKE THE "WHITE CHICKS" FBI AGENTS IN FULL DRAG, AND PRETEND TO BE AN NFL QUARTERBACK. SEAL INSTRUCTORS ARE PROBABLY GOING TO BE DEAD, LEGLESS, AND/OR EVIL. LET'S GATHER EVERYONE INTO LASER TAG, AND PAINTBALL GUN COMPETITIONS, TO START WITH, BUT REMEMBER, UNCLE SAM NEEDS YOU TO MAN LARGE WEAPONRY, SUCH AS NUCLEAR-ARMED SATELLITES, AND SPACE STATIONS.

http://m.wikihow.com/Throw-a-Spiral

http://m.wikihow.com/Throw-a-Football