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TO ALL ENLISTED: PLEASE CREATE USDA ORGANIC, ULTRAPASTEURIZED, HALF VEGAN, MILD, NON-SPICY, NON-ACIDIC, 99% FAT-FREE, SALT-FREE, LOW GLYCEMIC INDEX LOAD, BAKED/NON-FRIED VERSIONS OF THESE:

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TO ALL BARRIOS: ZAIR BEEZ MORE SHOOTINGS:

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TO ALL ENLISTED: PLEASE SWITCH MORE INTO HEALTHCARE, TO HELP GET THEM AWAY FROM THE PSYCHOPATHIKKK PSYCHOLOGY PROFESSORS:

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TO ALL ENLISTED: BOTCHED BUTT INJECTIONS CAN BECOME SEPTIC:

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TO ALL ENLISTED: GET EVERYONE ENROLLED INTO TAP DANCING CLASSES:

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TO ALL TOP SECRET C.I.A.: CHLOE BROWN'S NAZI-ISIS FAMILIES OF ALABAMA ARE NASS SHOOTERS TOO:

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TO ALL ENLISTED: FORCE ZEE SEALS TO PERFORM DISS TOO:

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TO ALL ENLISTED: ANTIBIOTIC OVERUSE CAN CAUSE HIGHER RATES OF LEUKEMIA TOO:

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TO ALL A.C.L.U. FEMINISTS, WHO ARE GLBTQ: PLEASE CELEBRATE THIS WITH GLBTQ, RAINBOW PRIDE-THEMED, MARDI GRAS, DANCE FESTIVALS, AT ALL NATO MILITARY COMMANDS

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TO ALL ENLISTED: JUST WRAP VEGAN HAM IN REDUCED FAT, WHOLE GRAIN, HEALTHY, USDA ORGANIC PASTRY CRUST, THEN, BAKE IT EVERY WEEK, INSTEAD OF EATING RED MEATS:

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TO ALL GLBTQ FEMINISTS AT THE A.C.L.U., AND ALL ENLISTED: GATHER INTO HEALTH-CONSCIOUS MEETUP GROUPS:

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